🌱 Care for Yourself
For many people who are used to caring, rest does not feel neutral.
It feels uncomfortable.
Unproductive.
Sometimes even wrong.
This is especially true for those who have spent years being relied upon — at work, at home, or in both. When your sense of worth has been shaped by usefulness, stopping can feel like a loss of identity rather than a relief.
Why Rest Can Feel So Hard
Rest challenges deeply held beliefs.
Beliefs such as:
- I should be coping
- Others need me
- I’ll rest when things are quieter
- If I stop, everything might fall apart
These beliefs often develop slowly and quietly, reinforced by praise for resilience and endurance. Over time, they can make rest feel undeserved rather than necessary.
The Difference Between Collapse and Recovery
Many people only stop when their body forces them to.
Illness, exhaustion, or emotional overload become the point at which rest is no longer optional. But recovery is not the same as collapse.
Rest taken early is protective.
Rest taken late is reparative — and often harder.
Learning to pause before crisis is not laziness. It is attentiveness.
A Gentler Way Forward
Caring for yourself does not require dramatic change.
It may begin with:
- allowing pauses without justification
- noticing fatigue without immediately overriding it
- recognising that rest supports care rather than competes with it
This kind of self-care is quiet and often invisible. It does not announce itself. But it sustains what matters.
A Reframe Worth Holding
Rest is not a reward for finishing everything.
It is part of what allows you to continue at all.
Learning this takes time — especially for those who have long placed themselves last.